In this current #MeToo phase, it seems that more and more cases of sexual assault and harassment are constantly being revealed, hurting the reputation of popular, admired celebrities. Aziz Ansari, however, is just one step further. He is a well-known supporter of the “Times Up” movement which covers celebrities in entertainment trying to raise awareness about the gender-imbalance issue and sexual harassment as a whole.
On January 13, Katie Way posted an article on the website “Babe” describing a sexual harassment story from ‘Grace’ (a pseudonym for the woman who wanted to remain anonymous), titled “I went on a date with Aziz Ansari. It turned into the worst night of my life.”
“Grace” is a 23-year-old photographer residing in Brooklyn, New York; however, this incident occurred when she was 22. The recount begins with her meeting Ansari at an Emmy Awards After Party where they realized they had both brought 80’s film cameras to this glitzy event. They texted for a while, ultimately leading up to a date on Monday, September 25, which is where everything went wrong for Grace.
According to the original story, “The date didn’t go as planned. The night would end with Grace in an Uber home, in tears, messaging her friends about how Ansari behaved.” Without getting into too much detail, Grace claimed to have been “physically pressured” into doing things which she may not have wanted to do.
Now, unfortunately, this sort of story is not shocking in society anymore, but due to the fact that Aziz Ansari, a well-known comedian and an outspoken supporter of women’s equality and the diminution of the gender pay gap, was accused of sexually harassing a woman, a red flag went up.
As saddening as it may be, when some celebrities and public figures, such as Donald Drumpf, are accused of saying things that strongly imply sexual misconduct, the accusation might not be as shocking as it was when Ansari was accused. According to Carina Hsieh of Cosmopolitan, this issue is especially scary because “a television creator who’s aligned himself with the women’s movement and even made an episode of his TV show dedicated to the side of street harassment men don’t see,” is being accused of sexual assault. People’s concern is if “it [is] unfair to expect better of him” simply because of how strongly he presents his views.
In response to the allegations, Ansari stated in a statement that he was “surprised and concerned” that everything was not okay for Grace because “everything did seem okay to [him].” He adds that “[he] took her words to heart and responded privately after taking the time to process what she had said.” Although he claims that he has done this, many others that have been accused have also said similar things; it is difficult to know the truth at this point.
What’s perhaps most intriguing about this case is the fact that the line between assault, which is against the law, and simply, legally being “douchey” (or perhaps just socially awkward) is becoming blurred. As I’ve stated in a previous article, the definition of sexual harassment has become much broader and to some extent, I believe, too broad. In no way am I saying that society should not recognize the severity of sexual harassment; however, I do think that what’s interpreted as assault is becoming a bit too broad, especially in comparison to how it was defined just 10 or 20 years ago. Something that was not considered criminal, or illegal at that time, is now punishable by law. In Ansari’s case, I don’t think it’s about being criminally charged, as to an extent his actions could be interpreted as unintentional behavior – which he claims. Instead, it’s about the ignominy that he experienced. I believe it is important to use celebrities as publicity and almost advertising, to raise awareness about these issues, which have just as much of an impact on everyday people.
As social norms progress and change, society naturally becomes resocialized to deal with our evolving understanding of this issue. In other words, the population needs to learn how to adapt their behaviors alongside the development of society in terms of what is considered acceptable and what is not.
Grace’s experience with Ansari is simply another example of major misunderstandings about sexual conduct that are prevalent within society.
In my opinion, Ansari’s case is no exception to the ever-increasing number of accusations; however, it is an example that is more confusing: it’s a new grey area. It may seem that sometimes there is nothing men can do right, but in reality, this awkward dialogue is required to change men’s actions and perception of what is considered okay and what is unconscionable.
In the end, it is more important to focus on fixing society’s understanding and behavior surrounding sexual assault, in hopes of improvement for future generations.
For more information visit CNN, Babe.com, Cosmopolitan.com, Hollywood Reporter.